Posted: 04/23 11:13 AM
.... hello everyone.
I am new to your forum...so please be gentle.
My story is probably not so unique, not most of it, anyway....
I am short on time right now, but the brief version is that I became aware many years ago that I felt a VERY likeable warm and fuzzy feeling with opiates, and as time went on and the internet made them easy to get my hands on them, I ordered away!
2/day became 4, became 8, and before I knew it I could easily gobble down 20 or more pills in a day.
Hydro, Lortab, Vics, it was all the same, any opi I could get. I could easily con friends out of giving me a couple, could raid people's medicine cabinets with the best of 'em, and all the while, I hid it from everyone. This went on for quite some time.
Fast forward to the time when, as all good things come to and end, so did the easy access pill-mill of the internet.
I found out about Kratom and gave that a try. And it worked! It really did keep the w/d away.
But nothing comes without a cost. Kratom in plain leaf form, used infrequently, MIGHT be a nice way to enjoy the occasional warm fuzzy, but I am not one who understands such moderation of anything, least of all opiates! And kratom, while it may not BE an opiate, it certainly mimics them in many ways.
Well, some evil genius scientist(s) figured out a way to make "Extracts", in other words, kratom that was better, stronger, faster than it's regular plain leaf original, and low and behold, we found ourselves something to rival even the strongest of opiates.
250x! Full Spectrum Tincture (FST), Ultra Enhanced Indo (UEI)... all expensive and all very very addictive and inviting to an addict like me.
I've been using UIE now for quite some time, and to use plain leaf now would be a joke, that would not even TOUCH the w/d I experience from this stuff. Heck, for me to feel pills at this point, it would take 4 or more 10/500's.
This stuff is POTENT.
And.... it's going away. The company best known for carrying these extracts sent out an email saying 'no more extracts, so get it while it's still available, because we're getting rid of it, first come first served, and when it's gone, it's gone.' hmmmm.... makes you wonder, no?
Anyway....I have tried, tried, and tried again to wean myself back down to plain leaf, but I just can't handle the w/d.
I wish I'd never heard of kratom, that I'd just endured the w/d from the pills years ago and been done with it.
So, after a long battle, I am going to a sub doc tomorrow morning.
I pray it helps me once and for all get rid of this demon. I'm so tired of hiding it from everyone, of always being broke, of the fear of being found out, and of course the constant making sure I don't RUN OUT!
It's exhausting, and terribly depressing. I can't believe what a mess I've made of things.
For anyone considering kratom (I did see that on another thread), don't do it. And if you are a person who just MUST try it, plain leaf only! Do NOT try any enhanced varieties, or extracts. they lead down a very dark path, I'm not kidding.
I know of what I speak. I am new to this forum, but certainly not to opiates and their effects.
This stuff is no joke, and it's no surprise they are discontinuing the sale of all these extracts.
Anyway, wish me luck tomorrow. I go at 12:00.
I'm going to the beach in 2 weeks, and to be honest, I will be glad no to have to worry about taking enough kratom with me, hiding it, scooping it, etc. I sure hope this sub works for me. I pray it does.
Thanks for reading!
I look forward to getting to know you all.